Pharaoh ❝gg ez❞ Atem (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
puzzlekeeper) wrote2019-06-22 08:25 pm
puzzlekeeper) wrote2019-06-22 08:25 pm
Question Meme v. 2
10,000 COMMENTS MEANS I'VE RPed TOO MUCH so u know why not talk about that
Ask me questions, I respond and then ask you a question, etc etc we know how the tradition goes
Ask me questions, I respond and then ask you a question, etc etc we know how the tradition goes
no subject
im going to have to type SO MUCH you owe me BIGTIME!!!!
Okay so, as I recall, the progression after that went > Intensity is emotionally constipated for a while and can't deal > he sort of(?) accidentally confesses(?) to King at Angel's party > sort of dancing around each other for a while so Intensity could sort his shit out?? > accidentally falling into bed a second time > more dancing around, for like, 20 more days?? > dueling officially > like two days later, oh god we shot way past dueling. Where are we now? What's happening. Oh god. Fuck.
And now I think we might be slightly past "Oh god. Fuck." Maybe? King is, anyway.
So backing up to all that, as we'll recall following the Hunger Games and Intensity's general caginess around that time, King was basically convinced Intensity hated him to the point he wanted him to just, not even exist anymore, even if he denied it. Because, /gestures to that MESS. And then Intensity had his personal realizations and his panic meltdown and then accidentally spilled his cards at Angel's party, and King's whole view of Intensity shifted somewhat with that, because something suddenly made sense where before there were only question marks. Even Maki couldn't figure it out when King talked to her about it!! So suddenly he understood - this isn't calculated maliciousness or something. This is Intensity having feelings and dying.
He's pathetic, actually.
^ This was a key turning point for their CR overall. This is when King stopped seeing him as an actual potential threat and more as someone he might be able to trust one day, if they reached an understanding.
In my previous CR meme comment I talked about how King was testing Intensity, how he was worried Intensity will go off the rails and become an overlord and King will have to take him down - and while King will still take him down if necessary, he no longer has any expectation that he'll have to. Intensity is smart and capable but he also panics and tries to run out of his own lab if you thank him for saving your life. And he saves your life in the first place! Then makes you a heated cape to keep you warm! He's FUCKING PATHETIC. King likes him a lot more now that he knows this.
So... they had more interactions that were, if not strictly positive, at least not terrible. And King started to actually see the things that before he only heard about in passing, about what a good person was and how kind/generous he is (where before King had only seen the worst of him, because that's all Intensity showed him, and it just lead to the geometry lady meme when people talked him up.) But then he saw it for himself! It started being DIRECTED AT HIM, even! Intensity kidnapped him after he found out he was dead and tried to bolster him in his... Intensity... way, even if it mostly involved yelling about how King needs to be not dead. But that was all stuff King really needed to hear! And having Intensity say shit like "there's nowhere you're going to go that I can't follow and I'll drag you back no matter what" is like... Intensity doesn't say that unless he means it, and if he means it that is not a casual sentiment. That's very clearly "you're important enough that I will pierce death for you"
So... King was kind of humbled by that, for a while. Utterly taken aback at first, obviously, but that talk was when King was really like - fuck it, I'm going to throw my lots in with him and trust him. He told him he'd help him achieve his endgame goals (as opposed to being in a somewhat uneasy and distant truce before) and had Intensity prove he'd catch King if he fell - literally - and Intensity passed all of it with flying colors. So that was another formative moment. Basically from that point on he was just waiting for Intensity.
And then after the whole Sekhment kerfluffle, Intensity went out of his way to kidnap King and check in with him to see how he was doing and how he handled things, albeit in his very Intensity way, and it reaffirmed what King had picked up from that previous encounter. They were on the same page about revenge and murder! Intensity dunked him in the bay and he tried to drown him for it! He used stupid flashy FIN magic to dry them out so King wouldn't be cold! IT WAS GOOD ALL AROUND. And then they walked into just a fuckin, feelings landmine. Or King did, anyway.
Intensity revealing how distressed he was about King leaving back home was the other formative moment, because even if it happened in the heat of the moment - or rather BECAUSE it did - King knew that was honest vulnerability coming from Intensity, and it's very rare to see that. And it also upset him because... what exactly can he do? This is Intensity expressing distress over things that happened in the past and he can't do anything about - Intensity, who acts like he doesn't even care about all that. WHAT DOES HE DO??
His answer was to basically double down and be as clear as he can about his sentiments to Intensity so that he can't misunderstand anything: King cares for him a lot, so much, TOO MUCH FRANKLY, and if Intensity is going to throw around statements like "you're mine" then King fully expects that to be reciprocated. And after the initial feelings meltdown he thinks they reached that understanding, without even needing to use words or yell or have a whole fight about it. They just kind of... got each other in a key moment. THIS IS BIG, FOR THEM. And was very important to King. It made him hope this isn't all a terrible idea that will end horribly.
And then of course, since then, things have happened like: King demanding to take Intensity home after kissing game and Intensity going along with it without complaint AND not panicking and ditching, but actually being there the next morning; FIN sticking their neck out TWICE to help HSS, at very real detriment to themselves; Intensity getting upset when he died in a game and making him a dumb cute electric cape so that he'll be warm. He's kind of flabbergasted and overwhelmed, in general, and part of him is waiting for Intensity to be like "actually this is a lot of trouble, fuck this," but then he remembers Intensity flying off the handle when King so much as implied Intensity wouldn't obsess over King at all time, so...
Now he's just rolling with it? It seems to be going... okay?? He thinks they may in fact be in a good spot right now (INCREDIBLE)? He is, dare I say it, HAPPY WITH THINGS RIGHT NOW?
That was the timeline blow-by-blow but as for actual Intensity Feelings:
King doesn't throw the l-word around much really and he's not sure if he would or should apply it here, but there's absolutely no denying how important Intensity is to him. When Silence came to HSS and asked point-blank whether King cared about Intensity too, he had no choice but to admit to her (and himself) that Intensity is one of the most important people to him here. At this point, probably about level with Hiryuu, who's only just behind Yugi. So... that's a lot. And it's kind of harrowing, because he's Intensity, and sometimes difficult to deal with, but King can't really pump the brakes on it now. It's much too late for that!! He actively craves Intensity's company, finds it exhilarating every single time, and was not at all lying when he told Intensity he wanted/EXPECTED to be Intensity's Most Important. That's just HOW IT IS, DEAL WITH IT. And getting some kind of affirmation of that definitely secured things.
So... what's past dueling I wonder??
OK REVERSE ME
no subject
First, let's go with parallels/transitions between ygo canon and Imeeji for 100. Early!canon Kaiba sure subscribed 100% to the whole "losing means death" newsletter. And it is only through painstaking patience and tenacity that the main cast (mostly Atem, some Yugi) manage to punt that notion to the curb. Only for the ygo manga to end with Atem's first loss and then well--- dying. And so every DSOD memory fills Intensity with not only an insane amount of grief about losing the only person he ever cared about outside his brother, but also a heaping amount of betrayal in the sense of "you taught me to believe in this shitty ideal and then it immediately failed me." And so with Imeeji being Imeeji and death being what is it here, that ideal has now warped into "I won't let death hurt me or mine." Intensity's adoptive father's teaching (who he doesn't remember) didn't work. And neither did King or Yugi's belief in friendship. But this --- this will work, because the only thing it hedges on is Intensity's denial, his ability to be ridiculous, and his ability to pierce space/time/death. All things that he is very confident about. So Intensity will devote all he has to remind King that he belongs to him and that he won't let death (true death - not fake game/Imeeji death) or King's own ridiculous sense of self-sacrifice touch him ever again. That sense of purpose is very important to Intensity because he is a very goal oriented person. And this is what he feels he can offer King in return for what King offers him. Because King is obviously not looking for a nice, reasonable, emotionally or even affectionately competent person in Intensity. He will never be these things. But protect King from certain aspects of himself - that Intensity can do.
Now onto timeline musing---!
So Hunger Games is where I left off last CR meme, and Intensity had at least come to the slow and sad realization that he couldn't just a) ignore King or b) murder him out of existence (even if he knew he wouldn't stay dead, maybe he could create enough of a gulf between them that they would just avoid each other for the rest of eternity). Nope. So then he and King play a game of cards at Angel's sleepover, Intensity gets riled up, blurts out a bunch of stuff he didn't want to and immediately retreats. Pretty standard Intensity play. And he felt pretty vulnerable around King after that - due to how many weaknesses of his that King knew (though King had reassured Intensity he wouldn't use them maliciously to hurt him) and that King always expected the worst out of him (his absolutely flabbergasted expression when Intensity bandaged up the hand after cutting him in the Social Bingo game). Cool, guess we'll just be rivals instead of Rivals. That's fine. They could still work together decently enough so maybe that would be the extent of it. Intensity may be reckless when it comes to games, but even he wouldn't play a risky move with his current hand against King's. That would be a guaranteed loss.
But then Heart Games happened and something obviously happened between Yugi and King in Nine-Nine's heart. Obviously something to do with his past, and Yugi had already shown Intensity the ceremonial duel. So he shows up later with a half-assed excuse about work and kidnaps King on his dragon. Intensity wasn't exactly sure what he was going for there. But King was obviously distressed which was prime opportunity for Intensity to provoke him. And that lead to some feelings talk, the realization the Intensity wanted King to be alive as a separate feeling of "Kaiba" wanting to bring back "Atem", and then trust falls and falling into bed together again. This time with no game instigating it. And it was nice. And comfortable. And something that Intensity wanted to continue. But still in the hazy shade of "what are we even doing?" Which means Intensity didn't think much about it for the next while as he was dealing with other issues (aka the Rift to Heaven opening).
Fast forward to auction game and King got triple amnesia. What's this? A playing field in Intensity's favor? Well damn, Intensity couldn't let the opportunity pass to fuck with King. King would pay him back with interest when he did get his memories back, so it's fine. It'd all be fine! So he introduces himself under his "real name" (in quotes because due to Trial shenanigans he actually doesn't respond to it) and pretends to be King's awful boyfriend. And it works! He gets to frustrate/fluster the fuck out of King for a bit and then life continues on as normal. King didn't even go for revenge!
Well, not until after the balloon game anyway. And it wasn't really revenge. He just oh so unceremoniously dropped Intensity on his ass and basically said "say that again but to my face this time!". And so Intensity did (in Intensity speak) and then I guess they were dueling! Go them. Back to Rivals with a capital 'R'.
Smash cut to Maki's Live and Intensity wanting to table flip all of his relationships straight out the fucking dorm window. FEELINGS AREN'T WORTH THIS POLITICAL NIGHTMARE. He vowed never to intentionally express another vulnerability again. And in the middle of this temper tantrum, King comes in to rile him up a little - Intensity doesn't really remember too many of the specifics besides "Don't ignore me". Which drove Intensity up a wall. As if he had been able to ignore King since he got here. And he tried so hard, too! He tried really fucking hard to ignore King! He'll show him that he's not ignoring King! So when the Sekhmet fiasco goes down, he is right fucking there to be devil's advocate for King. What was the Penalty Game, King? It better be up to your previous standards or Intensity will be fucking disappointed! But that also quickly devolved into attempts to power-top the other, which led to Intensity losing a game where the loser had to do whatever the winner wanted. Intensity is no stranger to these bets, and also no stranger to losing them. But he has definitely never had the outcome be -- well now his opponent is going to slowly murder him with tenderness and he is not allowed to fight back. And King tripped so many emotional land mines (that even Intensity himself had never acknowledged) that by the end he was exhausted. He has never been so physically or emotionally exhausted in his life. But King is his now(????). And he is King's. At least in some capacity. So now he gets a level-up in Intensity's special brand of fussing.
So, whew, last bullet point - castle building game. Intensity was so proud to see HSS stand up for themselves in the first round and then absolutely devastated to see their position after the second. And while he has been comfortable with just not hitting HSS before, now he knew that if they didn't do anything, they were surely going to die -- possibly horribly! Because with pep!pep! that low, he knew they wouldn't steal. So does he throw away his unit's safety for the selfish reason of he doesn't want to see King self-sacrifice himself into oblivion again? Luckily, FiN (even Erika) supported him and so they pitched in to save HSS. All for naught, though, because they still died. But that is a different moral dilemma. And he really really want to be there for King after it (since Yugi bolted and Intensity knew how it felt when Angel bolted on him) but the combination of having to admit real feelings to King, and then real feelings in front of Maki, and then real feelings by going to the ZRAEL dorm, plus having to make two worry visits (because he sure as fuck wasn't bringing the cape to ZRAEL) was too much for his small Grinch heart, so he backed out like a coward.
Sorry, King. He will still risk his life for you, but openly admitting feelings in public is still not on the table.
Now on to feelings talk.
Each of the "romances" (quoted intentionally) that Intensity has supplements for one of his own deficiencies. Man Eater understands him. Maki softens his rough edges. And Nemesis reminds him that he actually is just a teenage computer nerd (which is also why this is in constant game of straight chicken because Intensity will never acknowledge this about himself). But King -- King makes him a better person. He challenges him to always be at his best and, most importantly, he actually has the toolkit to course-correct Intensity when he's doing something wrong. He doesn't pull his punches - not when he needs to be harsh with Intensity and not when he chooses to be gentle either.
And Intensity really appreciates that - even if the words will never come directly out of his mouth ever as long as both of them shall live.
Intensity is a very cagey and retaliatory person. Expressing vulnerability usually goes hand in hand with him lashing out at the other person. And King has really been one of the people who has received the worst of it, but also is the one who manages to turn it around and successfully get to the underlying reason. He talks more with actions than words - through trustfalls and shutting him up with physical affection. He accepts Intensity's obsession - maybe even finds it endearing (sorry for your bad taste, King). And that is why he lets King touch his neck (an actual physical manifestation of his vulnerabilities) because he knows King won't intentionally hurt him or will hurt him for his own good. Because why would you want to break down your Rival? You want them to be at their best at all times. Otherwise where's the challenge?
Anyway Intensity is pretty fucking comfortable where they are right now and just wants to ride this high until something inevitably comes to break it (as that is the nature of his E-rate luck). The person more invested in something is usually the one at the most risk, and Intensity is at least self-aware enough to know that he is that person in this equation. (Unless King is keeping some card he doesn't know about close to his chest). So he'll accept that much vulnerability if it means this gets to continue. And he'll deal with the fallout if (when) this all goes to hell in a hand basket. Their Rivalry is definitely worth it.
Somewhat related, Intensity is doing his besto to avoid the landmines that is Yugi and King and now Maki and King. Yugi he's accepted as a given. And that is someone he'll have to work around at the very least. But there are things about Yugi that just grate on Intensity, which is why you sometimes have to bus him creatively! Because normal methods aren't going to work. And his little stunt is going to bite him in the ass later probably, so--- Maki, though. He is a little unnerved that King and Maki got together around the same time his relationship with King also strengthened. Is there something going on there he doesn't know about? Paranoia says yes. So right now, he'll just be really snippy and unhelpful regarding that subject until he works it out himself internally.
tl;dr King is Intensity's Rival and he will simultaneously do all he can to ensure his future while also being a grade A asshole about it. And forever bad at tender feelings even though King is so expertly able to wield them against Intensity.
Question. What are King's thoughts on how HSS should play in games now (both his inward thoughts and what he'll advise to the unit if they are different)?